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Relationships & Dating with Herpes

Relationships & Dating With Herpes

Many people who find out they’re HSV+ feel like their dating and/or sex life is over. This initial reaction is common, yet exceedingly inaccurate.

It’s not a grounded belief. It’s pure emotion speaking, generated from the experience of shock—nothing more. Feelings have a way of making people crazy at times, as we all know. However, this doesn’t mean that they’re correct, as we all know as well.

Once education on HSV is provided, it becomes much easier to calm down and accept the reality of the situation. The reality of the situation is simply this: you have a virus. The virus is mostly harmless. It’s certainly not life threatening. And most of the time, it produces no symptoms.

On top of that, the majority of society also has the exact same virus.

There are more HSV+ people than there are HSV-. So… why is someone’s love life over again? It’s not. Case closed.

Cool with the herpes talk

Here, we’re going to post real testimonials by real people who have successfully dated (and tied the knot), or who are successfully dating with HSV.

Obviously, since most of the population has it, people are generally doing just fine. However, this page will be dedicated to people who are HSV+, aware of their status, and have taken the time to write something about their situation on an online herpes message board or Website.

Real Life Stories of Love and Herpes

For anyone who requires more than numbers and facts to feel good, it is our wish that this section provides hope where it is needed. And, as stated in the previous section, new testimonies will be added here regularly as well.

If you’d like to share your dating or relationship success story on here, please post your comment below. The inspiration you provide will be greatly appreciated by anyone who needs it.

​I joined 2 years ago when I was unexpectedly given this "gift" from a boyfriend who did not take any responsibility for it, and quickly said goodbye to him. I dealt with feeling angry, feeling disgusting, feeling heartbroken, feeling absolutely terrible... all of the awful things that you might also be going through. I dealt with wondering who I could trust and confide in. I dealt with having absolutely no hope in finding love, and wondered if I would ever have the chance to make love with someone (I was still a virgin). I pushed through it, and it was…

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What’s your herpes dating story?

Please post an anonymous comment below to help others see that herpes really doesn’t have to interfere with having great sex or great relationships. We’d love to hear your story.

This Post Has 5 Comments
  1. I started to date a guy a few weeks ago. I was upfront from the get go that I had HSV-2. He didn’t seem to care until he didn’t “feel” well. He thought he had contracted HSV-2 which he didn’t. I was supportive of him when he was stressing over it. He started to ignore me and gave me the “you’re a great girl” speach but he can’t be with me because of my condition. Of course, he waited till 2 days after Christmas to confirm my suspicions. He didn’t care that I had HPV and he admitted he probably had that himself (potentially more harmful than HSV-2).
    It hurt my feelings to be rejected. I understand his concerns of not wanting it but there were other underlying reasons he wouldn’t talk about.
    It hurts to be rejected, hurts even more when it’s because someone made you sick and lied about their health.
    Forever affected, forever alone

  2. It was about a month ago I was diagnosed with Herpes and I was in complete shock to say the least but I had no one to blame by MYSELF. From that day forward I made a promise to myself that the next person I had sex with will be my husband and someone I truly cared about . Being a 19 year old college student it seemed kinda unrealistic but I have to do what’s best for me and my body so I can reduce the chances of any outbreaks. I can’t had any outbreaks so far and would love to keep it that way ! God showed me from this experience that he loves me unconditionally because there could be WAYYY worse than herpes. Getting herpes made me realize that sex isn’t what it’s cracked up to be and you shouldn’t give your body away to just anybody because things like this can happen. Now this was the chance to change my whole lifestyle around and I wasn’t gonna let my god down like I feel let I let myself down. I’ve learned from this blog that you can have a healthy relationship and life with herpes and you can’t let this stop you, you just have to be more cautious now

  3. I need advice. I was given this by an ex boyfriend. I thought my life was over. I met a wonderful guy and but he moved for a new job. I eventually told him 3months in (before we had sex) that I had HSV2. I didn’t want to fly out to see him if he didn’t want to continue the relationship. He said he was okay with it. We were dafe at first but then he said he didn’t care and that he loved me. We were going strong and almost at the year mark; we have been traveling back and forth and only have a year left to go before I could move out there. The beginning of November he found out he had it and I went to visit for thanksgiving and he was hot and cold. Not nice. Fast forward to December right before Christmas and he said he doesn’t know how he feels about me (I love you but not in love with you right now). He said he was being unfair and resentful and doesn’t want to be that way. We didn’t break up. He said he needs more time. How likely is it that he will stay with me? Anyone had this experience where their partner changed their mind about the relationship after contracting it? He is almost 33 btw and I am 27- if that matters.

  4. My dating life has been pretty much non-existent after years of being single for fear of infecting anyone. I’ve made a great in this guy that had all the qualities that I want in a man but he doesn’t know my status and we’ve kept it platonic. I purposely had a disagreement because I want to end things without him knowing my status. Bear in mind, we’ve never had sex or anything of that sort but we’ve felt the connection for months now without saying anything to each other.

    I just feel doomed and alone in this. I also feel as if I join a dating site nothing will come of it so I would love to know where I can find a nice enough man who also has herpes.

    It’s not the end but I don’t want to pass in this gift to anyone.

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Post Series: Herpes Dating Stories
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